Supporting Your Athlete Through the High-Stakes Moments

A reminder for parents during college showcase season: your child has worked hard to get here. Help them keep the joy in the game.

Tournament after tournament. Long drives across Tennessee, Georgia, Kentucky, and more, all in my one summer. I get tired just thinking about it. It was an incredible opportunity, but it came with real sacrifice.

I was lucky to have parents who rearranged their lives to support mine. But still, I missed out on a lot. While my friends were at the beach or on family vacations, I was living out of hotel rooms with my AAU team. I loved the game, but sometimes I longed for a more typical summer.

And then there was the pressure.

When I knew college coaches were watching, the weight of those moments could feel crushing. Before some games, I wanted to quit. There were practices I skipped because I couldn’t handle the anxiety. At the time, I didn’t know how to explain it. Looking back, I realize how much pressure I was putting on myself.

I believed that one bad game could ruin everything.

If your child is in the thick of showcase season, here’s what I want you to know: they don’t need to carry the weight of their entire future on one game, and they shouldn’t feel like they have to.

Be Part of Their Support System

One of the biggest reasons I didn’t give up was the people around me like my parents, my teammates, and especially my AAU coach, Walter. After one game, he walked over and said, “Princeton wants to talk to you.” I didn’t believe him. I’m not sure my parents did either.

Princeton? I didn’t think I was smart enough.

But Coach Walter believed I was. He called coaches. He kept showing up. He reminded me I belonged, even when I couldn’t see it for myself.

Parents play that same role: showing up, offering perspective, and reminding your child of their worth beyond the stat line. In the moments they’re hardest on themselves, your belief in them matters more than you may realize.

Help Them Build Confidence, Not Just a Resume

If your child is feeling the pressure, here’s a quick confidence-boosting practice you can share with them:

Ask them to write down three moments when they felt unstoppable in their sport.

It could be a game-winning shot, a moment of resilience, or a time they felt completely in the zone.

Encourage them to revisit that list before games. These moments are more than memories, they’re mental anchors. Sports psychologists often recommend this technique to help athletes shift from fear to belief, build confidence, and calm their nerves.

Confidence is a muscle and we can train it.

Keep Perspective

Your child is more than one performance, one stat line, or one coach’s opinion. Remind them of that.

Help them stay connected to why they started playing in the first place… the joy, the challenge, the love of the game. That feeling is still there, even in the highest-stakes moments. Especially then.